Aşk acısını çek ve sahiplen!‏

Yola devam etmek için aşk acısını çek ve sahiplen!‏

Yine bir Tom Waits gecesi... Ama bu sefer kısık sesle ki kimseler uyanmasın. Yüksek volumelu bir  8.6 birası, Fransız Alplerinde hissedilen yalnızlık ama Japonya'ya kabulün vermiş olduğu datanılmaz hafiflik...

Kalbim acıdı bugün ve gözyaşlarım hizmet etti bu acıya. Kızgınlıktan değil, ama üzdün beni be coco, sen ki benim için yüce hoca, ev arkadaşı ve de güzel arkadaştın. Yazılacak o kadar çok şey var ki ama korkuyorum boğazıma saplanıp kalacak acıdan, ağlamaktan... Yakışıksız olduğunu bile bile içimden beddua ediyorum; sonra kendimce af diliyorum. 

Neden beni yalnız bıraktın, Marc. Onca güzel kelimelerle, şiirlerle. 

Safım, geçmişe tutkuluyum; affederim bi şekilde. Sorarım soruları kendime kendimce. Ama hiç bi zaman unutmayacağım. Beynimde ve kalbimde seni öldüreceğim senin o capcanlı Pinar'ı yalanlarınla öldürdüğün gibi.

Alkışlar...

Elbet bir gün gelecek ve tüm içtenliğim ve yalınlığımla "artık seni sevmiyorum" diyebileceğim. 

Ch. Du Bos

... "surtout il s'agit à tout moment de sacrifier ce que nous sommes à ce que nous pouvons devenir."

I Think Now You're Just Like Everybody Else

My eyes don't see the love in your eyes.

My heart doesn't receive the love from them.

I've already exhausted my soul, take, exhaust it a little more.

Because I think you're just like everybody else now.

 

Though last night I was waiting for you to come,

today I'm running away from you secretly.

See, I'd looked into my heart well enough,

then I understood that you're just like everybody else.

 

I completely forgot you, I'm sure about that.

Now my promise has gone to the past.

I don't even have grudge for you in my heart.

I think you're just like everybody else now.

Björk talking about her TV

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=213&v=75WFTHpOw8Y

Les utopies sont belle

Qu'on me la donne ou pas, je m'en fou complétement.
j'ai si aimé cette femme, que ma maison sent la rose.
comme la fumé d'un bateau, comme la siréne l'a ramené.
qu'elle reviendra ça c'est sure.
Les utopies sont belle.

Naked

"How did you get here?"

"Well, basically, there was this little dot, right? and the dot went bang and the bang expanded. energy formed into matter, matter cooled, matter lived, the amoeba to fish, to fish to fowl, to fowl to frog, to frog to mammal, the mammal to monkey, to monkey to man, amo amas amat, quid pro quo, memento mori, ad infinitum, sprinkle on a little bit of grated cheese and leave under the grill till doomsday"

Judith Butler on Violence, Mourning, Politics”

When we lose certain people, or when we are dispossessed from a place, or a community, we may simply feel that we are undergoing something temporary, that mourning will be over and some restoration of prior order will be achieved. but, instead, when we undergo what we do undergo, is something about who we are revealed, something that delineates the ties we have to others, that shows us that these ties constitute what we are, ties or bonds that compose us? it is not as if an “i” exists independently over here and then simply loses a “you” over there, especially if the attachment to “you” is part of what composes who “i” am. if i lose you, under these conditions, then i not only mourn the loss, but i become inscrutable to myself. who “am” i, without you? when we lose some of these ties by which we are constituted, we do not know who we are or what to do. on one level, i think i have lost “you” only to discover that “i” have gone missing as well. at another level, perhaps what i have lost “in” you, that for which i have no ready vocabulary, is a relationality that is neither merely myself nor you, but the tie by which those terms are differentiated and related.